HUMOR AND A HEAD

A Killer Left Me a Gift

Part of one anyway

Claire Franky
5 min readMar 18, 2024

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Photo by Cristiano Valadar on Unsplash

“Come on, please. Let’s go,” I said to my daughter in a slightly annoyed tone as she told me the name of every object in sight.

“Grass. House. Fence. Car.”

“Yep, that’s right. Let’s get in the car,” I said as we marched across the driveway hand in hand.

“Black car. Doors! Wheeeels!”

I need to get wheeled.

“Yes, Sweetie, it has wheels.”

“Touch wheels,” she said as she pulled away from me and stepped towards the back wheel of the car, giggling at her light-up shoes as she went.

“No! No, they’re dirty. Let’s get in the car.”

I opened the back door as she let out a scream.

I hope someone is about to shoot me with a horse tranquilizer.

“Touch wheels,” my daughter chanted.

“Touch it with your foot. Look, I’ll show you,” I said as I walked around her and lightly kicked the tire.

A beam appeared across her face as she too gave the tire a kick.

Well, she tried to kick it. She missed by about sixteen feet.

“You did it!” I lied.

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