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Dating Troubles
He Painted Another Woman’s Naked Body
I was angry and wanted answers
“I’m not seeing anyone else. I want to focus on us. See where this can go.” He said while gazing into my eyes.
Alright, we’re not in a fucking rom-com, Romeo. Just pour the wine.
Sam and I had been seeing each other for a few weeks when he uttered those words to me and I got blind drunk in response.
He was recently divorced, an avid cricket fan (it’s impossible to give a fuck about cricket), and had a successful career as a structural engineer. Or maybe it was a tortoise race umpire.
Who fucking cares?
Sam also considered himself an artist. He particularly enjoyed painting.
I know. I got excited and thought he meant body painting too. He didn’t.
The following week, my friend, Laura and I visited a classy wine bar to sip on Cabernet.
It was Jagerbombs at a college bar. We weren’t in college.
As I poured my heart out about how shit my Christmas gifts were from my parents, Laura began taking selfies. So I abandoned my woeful tale.
And daydreamed about throwing a straw at her. Or a chair.
