I DON’T KNOW

I Was Mistaken For An Adult

Please don’t ask me sensible questions

Photo by Siora Photography on Unsplash

“Good morning,” the man who stood on my doorstep said with a smile.

I already hate this.

If I hadn’t been walking in the door myself, I would have hidden behind the couch until you fucked off.

“Good morning,” I replied.

“I’m here to read your water meter,” the man said.

I don’t know what that is but it sounds shit.

He produced a badge with his face on and held it up for me to see. My daughter, who was sitting on my hip, launched forward to grab the badge. I quickly redirected her hand to avoid an assault charge.

“You should have received an email about us coming today,” the watery man added.

I read the first line and it sounded boring so I sacked it off.

“Oh, yes. I remember that well,” I nodded as my frustrated toddler slapped my neck.

“Great. Can you please confirm where on the property the water meter is located?”

Pass.

“Erm, I don’t know,” I replied.

I think you should apologize for assuming that I am an adult.