HUMOR

I’m Behind Bars Again

I knew this would happen

Claire Franky
5 min readJul 11, 2024

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Photo by Christopher Windus on Unsplash

“Can you take him downstairs while I shower?” My friend, Sasha asked as she handed me her newborn son.

“You want me to carry him through the stair gates? Are you joking?” I asked as I cradled the baby in my arms.

Sasha laughed. “Just wiggle the gate at the top of the stairs as you push the glider and lift the gate at the bottom of the stairs as you press the button.”

Oh, ok, yeah. That made so much sense.

I sighed and headed for the gate at the top of the stairs.

While cradling the baby in one arm, I pressed the glider and wiggled the gate with my free hand.

Nothing happened.

I tried it again. And again. Then I kicked it.

“Sasha! Your gate is broken,” I called over my shoulder.

“Just wiggle it,” she shouted back.

“I did wiggle it!” I shouted in return.

She stomped out of the bedroom and across the landing to me. Without saying a word she performed some kind of witchy fuckery and unleashed the gate immediately as she rolled her eyes.

Dick.

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