TODDLERISMS
My Daughter Claimed a Daddy at the Pool
I vetoed him
“Again!” My daughter yelled as she kicked her legs excitedly, splashing me.
“Are you sure you want to jump in again?” I asked.
“Yessss!”
Are you really not going to prioritize my mascara?
“Ok, ok,” I said, dragging her through the water to the edge of the pool.
She squealed with excitement as I placed my hands under her arms and lifted her up onto the side. A large smile spread across her face as I took a step back.
“Remember to wait until three and then jump,” I called
She nodded and looked down at the Peppa Pig picture on her swimsuit before patting Peppa’s head.
Do I teach her to do stuff like that? Am I that weird?
“One. Two. Thr…”
“Man!” My daughter screamed, staring over my head.
“Ahhhhh! Man! Man-daddy!” She shouted at the top of her lungs.
What the fuck?
My forehead crinkled in bewilderment. Stepping forward, I pulled my daughter down to a sitting position while she continued to stare and giggle. Placing my hands on her legs to keep her still, I turned my head and scanned the…
