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HUMOR
My Dog Tried to Urinate on Some Runners, It Made Me Happy
Another beautiful moment in nature
If I walk another two thousand steps, I could eat the last cookie. But what if someone else eats the cookie first and I do another two thousand steps for no reason like a chump?
No, just do it. It’s worth the risk.
I looked down at my naked wrist.
Oh, yeah. I stopped wearing a steppy counter watch three years ago. What happened to it? Raccoon? I’ll just have to count. One, two, three… What’s that? Voices? Why now? Why ever?
“Sammy,” I called to my dog as I tugged on his leash.
He trotted over to me as I spun around, scanning the fields and walking trail around me. Shrill giggles filled the air.
Ugh.
I followed the noise with my eyes. Rounding the corner behind me were a group of four women — ponytails, sports bras, and bicycle shorts up their asses.
A bunch of Jessicas.
“Sammy, come here,” I said, pulling him to the side of the trail as the Jessicas jogged towards me.
Sammy resisted. He froze in the middle of the trail, gave me a blank look, and cocked his leg.
