HUMOR
She Had an Attitude When I Gained Two Pounds
I should have skipped food
My heel tapped rhythmically on the gray carpet as my fingers toyed with the pockets in my sundress. I looked around the room at the other saps holding onto their bulging bellies as if their babies were going to fall out at any moment.
Pictures of vaginas filled the walls, which at thirty-four weeks pregnant, I’d grown tired of pointing and laughing at. One mother-to-be stood to study a diagram of a cervix on the wall.
Fucking perv.
Busy nurses walked back and forth between exam rooms and the nurse’s station. The other patients and I watched them curiously from the adjacent waiting room, hoping to be called next.
The slam of an exam room door startled me, making me shuffle in my chair. I knew what was coming. My eyes locked in on the nurse’s station.
Please don’t be Rita. Please don’t be Rita.
Rita appeared, slapping a paper onto the desk.
Fucckkkk.
I looked away, hoping that a lack of eye contact would save me.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lisa approaching. My heart jumped for joy and my fingers danced at my sides.
